Bitch

Sorry there is no other word to describe her. I had no idea that seeing a gynecologist could cause so much drama! Update from last post: the call I was supposed to get “by the end of the day” yeah. Didn’t happen. Big surprise. So I left a message on Wed (no response) and one this morning. At 2pm I still had heard nothing and was in the neighborhood so thought I would leave a written message. I also had a few questions that I didn’t want to leave on the voice mail at the call center and thought a note would be easier.
So I actually get a call back several hours later (I unfortunately missed the call…stupid cell phone coverage) and SHE is pissed at ME!!!! The message “ You have to give me time to get back to you on these things” (Uh, you said you would call Monday…its now Friday) “I know you have needs but I have things that are more pressing” (even if that is true, I don’t need to hear that). Then my personal favorite…” yes, you need X test, you have to schedule it on the first day of your period”.
I’m sorry…my what?? Have you heard a single word I have said since I walked into your office?? I came in to see you because I DON”T GET A PERIOD!!!!

AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

I am done. I don’t care if it takes me 3 months to get an appointment with another gyn, I cannot deal with her for one more second.

I felt guilty about being such a pain…for about a second. Please tell me if I am being unreasonable. Please tell me that your providers call you back when you leave a message. Please tell me that I will be able to find someone better.

Alpha male

I was forced to bring out my inner bitch (southern style of course). I went to the clinic ( without an appointment) and politely told them that I would sit and wait for my results. 2 HOURS later I actually saw someone who gave me the results ...Yeah! They were actually hubby's results. He was very excited that he passed his test with flying colors. I think I can actually see him puffing his chest and strutting around. It is quite funny.
Here is the unfortunate part. There is one more test that I might need before I can get the drugs, but it is expensive and not covered by insurance. So she is consulting with the fertility docs to see if it is something I really need. She is supposed to call me back..."by the end of the day"...yeah. right. I'll be here holding my breath.

FYI - yes, I am shopping for a new GYN

here we go again

Ya'll I don't know what else to do. The clinic is holding my results hostage...again!! I have left messages...again. I even tried to get an appointment (since that seemed to work last time). Nothing until the END OF APRIL. The conversation would take all of 2 minutes. No really- 2 min. Is it door number one (clomid) or door number two (referral to endocrinologist)?? The answer is locked away in their computers. All they have to do is look at the screen and tell me which prize I win.
Instead I seem to be getting the "thank you for playing" consolation prize of being ignored. I really have been trying to avoid sitting in the lobby until they give me my results, but a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do.

Now the question is...how much help do we need? Today hubby had his test and was a good sport about it. He made the mistake of telling his brother about it who promptly laughed at him. But I say, if he wants cousins for his kids he better shut up.
Now I have to play the "give me my f'ing results" game again. His results will determine which tests I have to have next. I will, of course, keep you all posted.

the verdict

The results are in...I have non-classic polycystic ovarian syndrome. It means lots of things but mostly that I have to have a little help to get preggers.

friday

Yet another conversation with said clinic secretary. Still no test results.
BUT
I did get an appointment for Friday :-) I am betting it gets cancelled. If it does I am bringing my tent and my laptop and will set up camp in her office. It will be a sit-in to raise awareness about the neuroses of the TTC woman. Won't that be fun?

On other topics: Today in acupuncture was strange, very strange. I had salt and herbs put in my belly button and then set on fire. Oh yeah, you read it right. Not just for needles anymore! They are breaking out the crazy stuff. All I can say is, if it gets the ovaries to work I will stand on my head and chant while lighting my belly button on fire. I am just that dedicated/insane/desperate.

Welcome little sis

Hello all
I have an anouncement to make:

My little sis has joined the blogging world! She is starting a new adventure, and has to live away from her hubby for a while. She could use some online girlfriends so if you have a spare minute please check her out here.

Thanks!!

Whup ass

Looks like I have to open up a can...
I have now left 3 messages at the clinic in search of my long lost test results. Yesterday's conversation went something like this " blah, blah, my test results are supposed to be in by now.."
(clinic secratary) " oh yes I see that your results are all in"
(me) " Is my NP in today?"
(her) "oh yes, she is here today"
(me) "Great, could someone call me back with the results?
(her) "Sure I will have her call you"

Calls: NONE
Results: NONE

Single girl was giving me advice last night. She suggested screaming into the phone until I got to talk to someone or go and sit in the clinic and refuse to leave. I think I might take lessons from the toddlers I know and pitch a hissy fit. Think that will work? My hissy fits are a little rusty, anyone got any pointers?

Harassment

How many times can you call a clinic before it is considered harassment? I guess since they left me 4 messages last Friday for apparently no reason, they will not mind if I call them every day until they give me my test results, schedule me for another appointment, or pawn me off on some poor unsuspecting fertility clinic.
I am an educated, motivated, and persistent woman. With most things in life that is an asset, but if you are the clinic on the receiving end of my incessant phone calls you might not think so. Whoever has the job of answering that phone, I pity you (but not enough to stop calling).

S&TC Quiz

I hear that some of my fellow belles had quite a chat last night. Sounds like fun! They also took the sex and the city quiz to see what character they were most like. Hello Mirandas! Since Raybelle happened to link to the quiz I HAD to take it myself.

You guessed it: Charlotte

Geez. It figures.

A few differences: my Jewish hubby was my first (and only) marriage and I didn't convert. Sorry hubs, no offense. But the "reproductivly challenged" part. Yep, that's me.

what's all the fuss about?

You know what the 4 messages were all about? Nothing! Only to tell me that my test results will be back next week. Why don't you just call me when they are back, huh? That would be slightly less stressful.

should I be freaking out?

I had FOUR messages from the doctors office today. FOUR!!!!
2 on my home phone and 2 on my cell. I missed the calls (obviously) and it was after hours when I got the messages, but what on earth warrants FOUR messages?
I am afraid, very afraid.

And the winner is??

The suspense is killing me. This morning I waved goodbye to a significant amount of blood and sent it on its merry way to the lab (to see what the problem with my cycle is). Now I just have to sit and wait for the results. Looks like it will be about a week+. I think this TTC thing is supposed to teach you patience because I feel like waiting is all I do.
Wait for the birth control to get out of your system (I heard lots of "it takes time") Yeah. Not 8 months.
Then there is the wait for ovulation, which in my case, could take millennia.
Then the worst is the dreaded tww (two week wait) with all of the "what if" going on. tourture.

With all of this training I am going to be a rock star at waiting out temper tantrums, or being patient with homework, I might even learn to cut my hubby some slack. See, I will be a good mommy. All I have to do is wait...

Dopey

Can the preggy/mommy brain thing happen before you actually concieve? Maybe it is a side effect of my blonde hair color or something, but I have somehow screwed up taking my meds. DUH. You would think that this would not happen considering that I have professional training on medications and am slightly obsessive about all of this TTC stuff, but alas when I checked my chart to record my temp today I am suppoed to have 3 more pills to take. Yeah, there are only 2 left in the container. What on earth did I do? I counted them when I filled the prescription and they were all there. My big hope is that I did not take 2 in one day. Oops! I am trying to make the hormone imbalence better, not worse! Maybe down the sink, on the floor, who knows??? This does not bode well for the future forgetfullness to come. Sorry my friends, if I forget about you it was not intentional I am just slowly losing my mind.


***Update: No lost pill, just a lost mind and an inability to count

The Irony

I am happy to report that the side effects are subsiding. Even if acupunture isn't enough to jump start my ovaries, it does helpto clear up my skin and put me in a good mood. That makes it worth my dime.

The irony I am experienceing is that I am working on a project in which I have to research family planning care of women...that means mostly "how NOT to get pregnant". So I am spending my days knee deep in birth control methods yet I think...I have got the how NOT to get pregnant thing pretty much figured out. It is the how TO get pregnant part that I am having trouble with. I guess I have got the how-to part of it figured out too. I mean I understand the physiology. My brain knows what to do, but my body is a "slow learner" I think clomid will make a great tutor :-)

It figures

Drugs are good but they do bring their little friends - side effects. I knew they were coming, but I am not sure how they are going to help my cause. The acne has arrived, whoo hoo! I had acne as a teenager, I did my time, but it is back for another round. As for the mood swings, I feel a little cranky but hubby might tell a different story. I hope its not too bad.
My big question is, how is a face full of zits and a bad mood supposed make hubby want to to be in the same room with me much less the same bed?

drumroll please...

I took the mandatory test this morning and OF COURSE it was negative. duh. I could have told the NP that there was no way I was preg but she had to cover her you-know-what. Fine with me. Today is day number one of the drugs, 11 more to go. Fun with hormones! I hope that they don't induce too much mood swinging or a revival of more teenage acne. Don't worry, I will keep you posted whether you like it or not!!

Chocolates, roses, drugs

No lovey presents for me this Valentines day. I get a preg test and some progesterone. whoo hoo! I have been avoiding the hubby for the last 2 weeks (doctor's orders) and have to take a preg test tomorrow just to make sure. I can tell you that answer right now, but I will take the test for kicks. Then we move on to the drugs. 2 weeks of progesterone that will supposedly invite aunt flo back into my life. Come on back! I have been taking the ovulation tests "just in case" my body decides to wake up on its own, but I think it is in a holding pattern. I get the 2 lines (still) but no surge. Of course, today was a little darker but still not a positive. I am not sure what is going on there, but the ovaries have 2 days to wake up or I am going to drug them and hope that they can rally for next cycle.
Stay tuned for more posts full of TMI. :-)

Stress?

So the other thing the NP said at my visit is that this could possibly be caused by stress. I think maybe there is some truth to this, and people keep telling me this (which is not that helpful). Hubby's advice was "stop stressing out about stuff" (REALLY not helpful). So I have been trying to figure out if I believe this is true and how much I can realistically do about it.

I am in grad school but have 1 class and can do the rest of my work from home, in my PJ's like I am now. I have a job but only work max 10 hours a week, and don't have any other life stuff to stress about. Everyone is happy and healthy. That combined with the fact that I took off 3 weeks over the holidays (no school, no work, no nothing) and still have f'ed up cycles tells me that either this is not ALL stress realated or I am going to have sit on my butt and do nothing in order to get pg. I think that would cause a different kind of mental strain- aka-boredom.

I am graduating soon and supposed to be looking for a job but I go through this daily argument with myself "this Pg thing could take a while and I have some great opportunities presenting themselves. so I should get a job" OR " I should focus on this pg thing, eliminate stress, keep my very part time job and not get a full time job". I am not sure I am capable of this! I LIKE being really busy. I am also having trouble with the "housewife" designation, mostly guilt about not contributing to the household. I feel like I should be DOING something. FYI - I am TOTALLY OK with the stay-at-home-mom designation, but what am I supposed to do in the meantime??

Can you tell I am struggling with this issue?

Thanks for listening.

The verdict

I now remember why most women are not excited to go to the GYN, but we did make a little progress. Gettin' some tests done but I have to get blood drawn on day 3 of my cycle which could be, um, next week, next month, next year? Who freaking knows. She wanted me to wait until I got there on my own, but I brought out the "don't-give-me-that-BS-I-know-you-got-drugs-for-that" look, and so she gave the drugs. I am a happy girl! I have wait 2 weeks before I can take them, 2 weeks before they work, then I get the tests done and probably have to wait another 2 weeks for the results. In the meantime this could be a rather boring blog. Sorry.
Let's get this party started!