Monday, November 27, 2006

Home again

Wow that was good vacation! I now have to deal with the post-vacation pile of things to do, but it was totally worth it.
On the TTC front. I (tried) not to think about it too much. We gave our best ovulation time effort and now we are waiting again. The trying not to think about it was complicated by my SIL announcing that they were also TTC again. oh joy (insert sarcasm here). So I tried not to be too paranoid about the future pregnancy announcement and the fact that it very well might come before mine. Tried being the operative word here. I also got lots of time to play with my beautiful niece. I LOVE being with her, but I must admit it does remind me of how much I want a little one of my own to play dress up with. Ahhh someday.
(hopefully before my SIL!!)

Monday, November 13, 2006

Cycle day

something or other. I am on vacation starting in five, four, three, two, one (days that is). I still have one more week, but then it is sunshine and not-so-sandy beaches! Yeah!
I do have to keep better track of my cycle this month since I am on my own but I am not stressing about it. I refuse.
When I get back, I plan to torture my husband. I am dragging him to a meditation workshop (given by my fertility clinic) and WE are joining a support group. He is being a good sport, but is just oozing reluctance. Sorry hubs, I think it help keep me sane in the long run. Don't we all want that?

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Censoring my netflix

I will have to take a closer look at what movies are waiting in my queue. Last night I was an unsuspecting victim. I was subjected to a movie about a husband cheating on his infertile wife and getting his mistress pregnant. Evil Movie!!!
I have no idea what happened next. That was as much plot as I could handle. I think there should be additions to the movie rating system. How about "I" for infertility content, or maybe a scarlet "A" would be more appropriate. I will be sure to screen my movies more closely in the future.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Bouncing back

Thanks for coming to my pity party yesterday. You know I always serve the best ice cream. Thanks for sharing it with me :-)
I guess I got all of the sad and moping out yesterday because today I feel surprisingly good. Go figure. Anyway, this next month is low pressure and low expectation. We are doing things the old fashioned way (well, sort of) I still have to drug my cycle into submission, but we will be on vacation during the ultrasound/IUI portion of the month so we are on our own. No doctors, no monitoring (guess they are confident that my 14 follicle days are over) and no expectations. I figure if last month with 2 follicles and IUI didn't work that the old fashioned way is not going to cut it. So I plan to enjoy my vacation (did I mention that it was tropical!?! :-), maybe have a few well timed romantic evenings and see what happens.
If this doesn't work, my body has December to get in line or we are going under the knife. I have decided to have surgery to get rid of my uterine septum and then maybe move on to IVF.

You hear that, body? You have until January 1 or drastic measures will be taken. You have been warned.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Negative

Again.

Breakfast: Ben & Jerry's Organic Cookies & Cream

Monday, November 06, 2006

To be or not to be?

Just in case the suspense was killing you as much as it is me, I thought that I would give you an update. The last few days I have had a disappointing lack of symptoms. Plenty of energy, no nausea, no nothin. WTF?? What happened to my general malaise? I want it back! I was SURE something was happening in there. What happened??
I never thought that feeling fabulous would suck so bad. I WANT to feel crappy (as long as it is for good reason). Ugh.
The official test is tomorrow, I hope that I am pleasantly surprised, but I am feeling perfectly fine and totally unpregnant.

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Maybe?

I will know nothing until Tuesday, but either I am
1. getting a cold
2. manifesting psychosomatic symptoms
3. possibly pregnant

I have had an underlying tired/not felling great all week. I actually had to take a nap the other day. I have felt the occasional twinge (although this has happened before and I still got a BFN) and, as I type I am feeling a teeny bit queasy (but this is not all that unusual for me either). Until there is a blue line or actual toilet-hugging I will not be convinced.

We will have to wait and see, but I also must confess that my hopes are WAY high this month. If I do end up with a negative I am going to need some serious stay-in-bed-and-eat-ice-cream-all-day therapy, and maybe some more of those great cyber hugs from ya'll.